January 6, 2017
As I type, I'm listening to Erik Satie's "42 Vexations, as performed on piano by Stephane Ginsburgh. It's music that can last forever, and which brings to mind, the concept of endless anything. So far this year, I have felt nothing but emptiness. There are objects in my room right now that has more life than me. For instance, this cup of coffee expresses a life that once was happening. A verb in action, but now just a noun.
It's freezing in my writing spot here, and I have a portable electric heater to warm my toes and foot. I don't wear socks because I can't stand to have my feet covered. If I had my way, I would like to be Sandie Shaw, who was known for going bare-footed in concerts and TV appearances. It's interesting how one can have an image of something like that - and to able to carry it off for years. Does she even wear shoes? Still, if you warm the feet, it somehow makes the rest of the body warm. I'm sure it's a psychological trick of some sort, and due to my schooling, I don't fully understand the process.
Right now, I'm processing the loss of my film print of "Greed," which is everything, and now gone, reminds me that I have nothing. My coffee is getting cold, so I'm going to put it close to the heater. I will get back to you later.