March 30, 2014

March 30, 2014

The most influential man in my life is without a doubt Warren Beatty.  What I admire about him the most is his seductive powers over women, or just the need for sexual adventures at all cost.  People poo-poo on him because I think he represents the real desire in a man’s make-up.   We often have to deny it, or claim total innocence, but in truth, as Woody Allen once said, “if there is reincarnation, I’d like to come back as Warren Beatty’s fingertips. ”

To be able to step into a room and you’re Warren Beatty must be a fantastic feeling.  I have two personal memories of Beatty.  My earliest memory of him was when I was with my dad and mom and we were invited, or taken to Jack Nicholson’s house right around the time of the release of “Chinatown.” We drove up to the entrance of a long driveway, and waited for a limo to pick us up and take us up to the party.  Once we were inside the car, we noticed a teenager on a mini-bike riding along us, and occasionally kicking the side of the limo as it was driving up the long driveway.  May dad asked who was that, and the driver just hissed out “It’s Brando’s kid, Christian.” Once I walked in the entrance I was taken back by the interior which wasn’t that exciting to me, but what was amazing was seeing Warren Beatty and Julie Christie sitting on the floor, among others.  Even the appearance of Groucho Marx couldn’t make me keep my eyes off Beatty.   He was beautiful, but only on the surface, which made him even more attractive.

His charm is very studied, like he went to a class to study to be Warren Beatty.  He didn’t have the inherent charm say, one of the great French stars at that time, Jean-Claude Brialy, who just oozed a certain type of personality that was totally suitable for his work with Godard, Malle, and Serge Gainsbourg.  But Brialy was too soft as a seductive person for me, I needed a Beatty who was full of strength and a certain amount of daring.  Being shy, I needed someone to follow who didn’t have one ounce of shyness or awkwardness in front of others, especially women.

When I tried to be seductive, I come off as John Astin, who was one of the main stars in “The Addams Family.” Totally comical and just the wrong approach!   I want seduction to be as easy as the song by Astrud Gilberto “The Girl from Ipanema.” The horrible truth is that my life more like an etching by Francisco Goya with maybe captions by Paul Verlaine.  The disgust that I feel for myself whenever I am in front of an attractive woman is truly a horror show.

The second and last time I came upon Warren Beatty was many years later.  I was employed in a bookstore and he came in by himself to shop, and I remember even though he was quite old, he still had an appearance of a little boy of sorts.  A little boy with an erection!  Nevertheless when he came into the store, there was an event taking place, and it was full of middle-aged women attending this specific event.  When he came in, it was like if God walked into the room.  The women literally swoon, and surrounded him like bees being attached to the honey.  He was very courteous to the ladies, and it struck me that if I was in his place, I would look like a total idiot.   Time marches on, but I am still the same as I was before, and so is Warren Beatty.