The Sunday Series:
Sunday June 21, 2015
Today is one of my favorite holidays of the year: Father's Day. We would not have father's day if it not was for the work of Sonora Smart Dodd, who in 1910, told her pastors that there should be a day for fathers, just like Mother's Day. They did celebrate Father's Day in her hometown of Spokane Washington, but after a while, due to the fact that she studied art at the Art Institue of Chicago, the events eventually died down without her participation. In 1930, she returned to her home town to promote Father's Day, but this time with the backing manufactures of ties, tobacco pipes, and any customary present to the male figure. With the assistance of the Father's Day Council which was an organization put together by the New York Associated Men's Wear Retailers. Citizens at the time resisted the so-called holiday owing to the commercial overtones. It was in 1966 that President Lyndon B. Johnson issued the first presidential proclamation honoring fathers. Making the third Sunday in June as "Father's Day." By the 1980s, the Father's Council wrote that the holiday "has become a Second Christmas for all the men's gift-oriented industries."
Although I do love Father's Day, my pop is dead. If you look on the bright side, this means that I don't have to spend any money for a present for my father. On the other side of the coin: well, he's dead. He's dead because he was murdered by a drunk driver. The driver got a six month jail sentence, but was eventually turned loose within two months of his jail sentence to go to his own world of pain and pleasure. Since I had no father anymore, except the memory of a father, I decided to purchase a bunch of Father's Days Cards at my local Trifity drug store. What I have done for the past 38 years is sending the drunk driver a Father's Day card once a year. I would write a personal note in it, letting him know what my life is like that year. Mostly personal stuff liked romances I had that went south or some that stayed longer. I also wrote a series of narratives I have in my head - like being with him, and joining his family on father's day. I wrote to him that I have kept track of his family, including his dad, who seemed to disappear some time ago. In one of my Father's Day cards to him, I wrote that "I'm very sad about the disappearance of your father. He must have loved you well, by the example of your current life."
I never heard back from him. Nor was I expecting to hear from him. To be honest, I wrote those notes to him more for myself than him. Don't tell anyone that. I don't want anyone to think I'm an eccentric guy. I know he gets them year - after - year, because I sent them all through certified mail, and he has to sign for them. The funny thing is that he does sign for all of them. One thinks that he would refuse this piece of mail, but it seems he has accepted all of them, which I have to admit, makes me warm all over. I wonder at times if it not was for the death of my dad under his misdirection of using the steering wheel, if we would be this close?
Today, being father's day, I decided instead of sending a father's day card which I have done without fail for so many years now, if I shouldn't just pay him a visit and personally hand him over his card. That may be a shocking surprise for him! He lives in a large family home in Woodland Hills, and like me, he's getting up there in the age category - but I have heard that he is still physically healthy -he did have a cancer scare, and of course, I mentioned in one of my father's day cards, I wish him the best of health, and that surely he can beat the mighty "C." Hell, he beat a jail term for manslaughter, surely he can beat the C.
I never talk about him to anyone else. Sometimes it is too painful of a memory, but I never felt any bad will towards him. His dad was a rancher in those parts -living more on the hills than the flat land. When he disappeared about twenty years ago, I was of course, very concerned, and wrote to him in that year's card. "If there is anything I can do, please don't hesitate to contact me." He never got back to me. That's OK. We both have something in common is that we don't have Dad's that are around us anymore. And to be honest, I'm more thankful that I know what happened to my dad, but he.... He will never know, except his dad is not here or more likely nowhere else.
Today I plan to go to his home and if he's up to it, take him out to lunch. Maybe share a few bottles of brew in remembrance of dads in general. I have tried calling him, but someone else either answers the phone and refuse to bring him to the telephone, or once or maybe twice, I did get him on the phone. But he claimed it wasn't him, where in fact, I know it was him at the other end of the line. I never take offense, because his reaction is totally understandable. So yeah, I'm going to get into my little GTO and head out to his pad, and take him out to lunch. It is best to do these things now, because who knows what will happen in the future. Something can happen to me or more likely to him, so it's good to take advantage of the day - this being Father's Day. Happy father's day everyone.