July 16, 2014

July 16, 2014

We all have ideas what a home means to individuals, but for me a home needs to be a fortress.   As one gets older, I find the external life out of my home to be distasteful.  I’m consistently repulsed by how humans interact with and among themselves.  Ever since I was a child, I have enjoyed the idea of having space, where my enemies can never find me.  When I was living in Beverly Glen, I had a secret hideout that was basically under a tree that had full limbs of leaves hiding a vacant area, where I could clearly hide, and even put some of my favorite toys and books in place.  I remember placing my favorite books there, but I would protect them by covering it with a plastic bag.  I often sneaked out of my family home into a world of my own making, which was under the tree, that was in reality in my backyard.  But as I got older I found other locations to hide out in, and what was important to me was a shaded area, that had no foot traffic going by it.  

As an early reader of comic books, the one thing that impressed me about Batman was his Bat-Cave.   Here he can work in secret with his various tools to fight crime.   I was intrigued by his laboratory, and quite impressed that even while he was working in the bat-cave he would wear his full costume.  In other words, he had a work uniform and even though he was self-employed, his own-boss in a sense, he kept the appearance of working by wearing his costume, even though no one was around to watch him work - except for us invisible readers of the comic book.   Which gave me the idea to wear my own work uniform, which was a lab coat that I got my parent’s closet.   I stashed it under the tree among the books and toys.   Once I entered the enclosed area, I would put on my lab coat and do some work.  Which at that time was to play with my toys and do some reading.

As I got older, meaning when I became an adult, I was fascinated with Marc René, marquis de Montaiembert, who was an 18th century French military engineer and writer. He was famous for his work on fortifications, and wrote a classic book “La Fortification perpendiculaire, ” which was his theory on making forts suitable to modern conditions of warfare.   He was very much inspired by Vauban who was a Marshal of France, who designed the fortifications, but he also wrote about how to break into a fort as well.  One of his contributions was to make a radical suggestion of giving up some French land that was indefensible to allow a stronger border with France’s neighbors.

When I was looking for a house to buy and live in, I for sure wanted something that was like a fort that will keep the outside world ‘out’ and me being me, separate from a population that I really don’t care for.  Israel appears to me to be more as a fortress than a country.  Which technically I find pleasing. The restrictions of space, time, and its borders to keep out a population is something that is totally understandable to me.  In fact, it inspired me when I got my home.  Not only do I have security cameras, alarms, but also two-way mirrors where I can look out, but no one can look in.  Also besides having standard locks, my doors have a series of codes, that are changed once a month.   Once secured in my world, I can let my imagination roam and create my own special landscape of dreams and desire.

I was very much taken by the home of Turner in the film “Performance.” James Fox’s character is on the run from his fellow gangsters, and here he found his own fortress, right in the middle of London.  Inside this house, it had its own rules and logic, which were not only an erotic turn-on for me, but also I love the separation of real life that was out there, and the life that was being performed inside the structure.   In such a place, I can explore my sexuality, my art, and desires all in one spot.