January 16, 2014
Every morning I have my breakfast of English muffin with peanut butter and a touch of blueberry jam facing my street and always that abandoned car in front of me. About two months ago, I saw a young man in that car, but it seemed like he had trouble starting the engine. I ate one side of the muffin slowly and from the first bite to the last, is exactly how long it took him to try to start up the car. After that I never saw him again, but I am reminded of him whenever I see his car, and that happens every morning.
To distract myself from the sight of the car, I started to read Miguel de Cervantes' "Don Quixote," but the car kept distracting me from the read. I could easily remove myself from my seat where I have breakfast all the time, but I started to resent the fact that I have to move and not the car. The feeling of anger in the morning is not a good feeling at all. But the car in front does change, it gets dirtier and dirtier. Also the front door windows are open, so who knows what goes on inside the vehicle when I am asleep at night.
The other day while I was taking my walk I did go near the car. I didn't want to touch it because it was so dirty. But I did give it a quick glance and what I thought I saw was an image of Kate Moss, maybe a photo taken by Francesco Scavullo on the back seat. It was such an odd juxtaposition to me, that I went back to my house and played some records.
Once inside the house I picked up the Quixote book, but changed my mind and read one of Susan Sontag's essays from her book "Styles of Radical Will." For whatever reason I played the original cast recording of "Hello Dolly" with Carol Channing, and something by Ethel Merman. I just wanted something glamorous and sophisticated in my life.
But again, I felt a depression sneaking up on me as I ate my breakfast of English muffin with Peanut Butter and jam, facing that same image of that abandoned car.