March 20, 2020 (In The Year of the Trump Virus)

March 20, 2020 (In the year of the Trump Virus)

I just delivered my mom some bread that we had in the fridge as well as a bottle of wine. I left it on her front porch, walked away to the street, and then called her to come out to pick up the package. She came out, I waved, and then got into the car and left. I was going to do a significant shopping for her (as well as for us), but I presume that the food markets will be intensely busy, and decided to go later in the day, or within a few days. Both my mom, Uncle, and his mate, and yours truly have food in our houses for at least the end of this week. My thinking is to avoid panic buying or avoid other panic-buyers. 

My mood is not on the bottom floor, but somewhere in the middle of the building, perhaps on the sixth-floor. It's either here or there. I was laid off work yesterday, and all I have read is how many people lost their jobs in the past 24-hours. I'm not angry whatsoever, just disappointed because I enjoy this part (really part)-time job greatly. It's a bookstore, and like the other bookstores in the Los Angeles area such as Skylight Books and Book Soup (my old residence) is fully closed until further news. Libraries, my second home, is closed as well. Well, everything is closed that's emotionally important to me. Essential is more body-based, such as eating for survival, and emotional are all the fun shops. 

I spend my time writing and reading the current issue of MOJO Magazine (good article on Jimi Hendrix's last days) as well as a big biography on the legendary surfer Mikki Dora. When I take my baths, I read Cornelius Cardew's "Stockhausen Serves Imperialism." Cardew was an English composer who studied under Stockhausen as well as exploring the works of John Cage. Somewhere down the line, Cardew became a hardened Leftist and denounced Stockhausen and Cage. It's a fascinating read. I have always had a soft spot for individuals who are extremists. Which, in this time and age, makes many nervous. 

I'm a prisoner in our home, and it's not unusual for me to spend days at a time working and living in this space. So, I don't have any problem staying at home, especially when a library and records surround me. Depression does sneak up to me, especially the body blows of the Trump Virus taking effect on my surroundings. It's difficult not to see my mom and Uncle at this time. Still, I do help and think of them all of the time. - Tosh Berman